Loving Yourself is a Responsibility
Loving yourself is a really big responsibility. Creating a relationship with yourself, turning yourself into your own best friend is really the first step to having a good life. When people don’t love themselves it is often because they are scared of the consequences of commited self-regard. Loving yourself comes with certain responsibilities. It means you’ve got to take yourself seriously. It means you’ve got to be consistent about honoring your own values, asirations, needs and ideals. Not loving yourself actually gives you excuses to do a whole lot of unloving, irresponsible things that you wouldn’t be able to do if you really loved yourself and took yourself seriously. The first thing you need to look at is what would the consequences be of loving yourself and why are those consequences scary for you.
People complain all the time in relationships about being too fat, too short, having no brains, fashion sense and many other things. It’s as if they are going out of their way to convince others that they are not a worthwhile investment. Often they actually succeed and get rejected. Maybe they were testing whether person would say “Oh, no, it’s really not like that”. And if the person does say what they hope for, would they believed it? The challenge is loving yourself. Value yourself, understand what your true worth is, then you will know what to expect from the other people and you will be able to accept the investment in you by others graciously.
Allow yourself to be loved because you consider yourself to be a person whose worthy of love. If you don’t feel worthy of love, then you are going to find it uncomfortable to allow someone else to love you and constantly challenge them or try and put them off because you are scared to accept their love. Maybe you are also scared of the responsibilities or costs of being desirable and attractive and loved and having someone else committed to you because obviously, if someone is committed to you, that requires certain responsibilities from you as well.
Decide whether you are seriously prepared to allow yourself to be loved? To love yourself enough to accept the love that is being offered to you and that’s really your key challenge. And once you’ve met this challenge, then revisit whether you really want the people from whom who try to get love to be the ones who love you and whether they are willing and able to love you in the way that you wish to be loved.